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Back in the Saddle, Again

This is what my next month looks like. I had to set up a plan for myself, because just winging it wasn't exactly cutting it – this past week I only ran once and walked once. So sad.

I've got 9 weeks of Hal Higdon lined up for myself! Here is the first month.

Well, I finally got around to watching the From Fat to Finish Line documentary yesterday, and it mobilized me. It reminded me of all the things that are important to me, and all things that I want for myself.

It was funny, because my emotions were pretty much contained until a few minutes after I finished watching (though I was a little sniffly). And then, I went to see what my partner was up to, he asked me if I finished the movie – the waterworks started. I completely broke down.

It made me realize how much I'd missed running regularly and how much I needed it for my overall well-being. It made me think about the things I really want for myself – good health, mobility, setting and reaching fitness goals, working my way out of plus sizes, doing fun and active things with my sweetie on the regular.

I had a good week and a half or so recently, but then all it took was two days to gain back the pounds I lost and for me to wonder why I keep bothering (again). Some experiences over the weekend and then watching the film changed all that and I am reminded why I keep bothering.

Though I am not thrilled to be back where I started (298.6), I am thrilled that I am not yet at the 300 pound mark. And I am determined NOT to be ever again.

Today I am back to logging my food on MyFitnessPal and my exercise routine. What you see on my calendar is the first month or so of Hal Higdon's novice 5K running plan, which includes running three times a week and walking the rest. I added on an extra week in the beginning just so that I can get three solid days of 1 mile running before diving in – Hal's starts at 1.5 miles, which I can certainly do, but I really want to ease in so that I don't get discouraged.

I also have the support and encouragement of my partner, who is also losing weight and who is my walking buddy. (I give support and encouragement, too! It's nice to have that built-in right at home.)

So many other thoughts have been coursing through my head... maybe I will just bullet point some of them out:

• Sad that I gave up on my half training months ago and missed out on running the Wineglass Half Marathon with my friends – but Amy F. said to plan for it next year, because they're doing it again! (Will do!)

• Sorted through clothes again and packed away everything that doesn't fit well or that I don't like into a bag for the charity box. I haven't done that in a while, and boy did it feel good! (On the opposite end I reacquainted myself with the clothes that are too small for me yet and felt motivated by the sight of them.)

• Still trying to get good planning to brown bag my lunches most days. I didn't do too badly last week. This week I started out with take-out, but it was a Panera salad that I took a 1.7 mile walk to retrieve, so I feel OK about that. I was exhausted from my emotionally fraught weekend and it was all I could do to get myself out the door, much less put lunch together. We're also still working on cooking dinner at home – getting better and better! They key to everything seems to be actually having a well-stocked kitchen. (der!)

• I desperately need a haircut.

• I still have weight loss goals. They are: 1. To be in the 270s at Thanksgiving. 2. To be well on the way to 250 at the new year.

• My first new running goal is a 5K on December 11th.

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